German Theory

There's this old German psychological theory that applies to so many things in life: career, friends, family…and love.

 

Gestalt: The WHOLE is greater than the SUM OF IT'S PARTS.

 

This means the individual aspects of something aren't comparable to the entire entity.

 

So, sometimes a person's flaws isn't comparable to who they are as a person.

 

The man who figures this out will be the one who accepts me, flaws and all; he'll realize that I am not a mythological creature (so he'll know not to expect one) and will see the God in me and realize that I and His relationship includes helping me to minimize those things that the last guy may see as an arresting factor. Notice that I said 'minimize' and not 'eliminate', because although those parts aren't greater than me they DO make me who I am, so it will be next to impossible to COMPLETELY change those things. I am who I am because of my flaws. You all are, too.

There ARE some things that are detrimental to your spirit and all that you encounter; those you must also give to God. But character flaws (that we all have) must be accounted for and weighed by your potential partner. It is that one whom in the back of their minds knows Gestalt's theory (without ever having a psych class :) who will see you for the wonder that you are.

 

As for those who chose to have your individual parts outweigh your being, thank them. Thank them for making way for the person who is actually supposed to be with and appreciate you. Thank them for also helping you realize those flaws (but beware of people who project their own flaws onto you; it may be them and not you) so that you can acknowledge them. Don't pity them for not giving you a chance despite those things; there's someone out there who will!

 

I am in no way condoning complacency with less than desirable conditions; if you are in a situation that is not changing due to your laziness, lack of drive, or bitterness towards all mankind…no, NO one has to deal with you. And you should not feel that they have to. It's not fair to you, first of all, to continue living a life that is not to its full potential. Secondly, it's not fair to throw up your hands and say "Well, this is me", and wonder why you're alone…you know the difference, so don't act as if you are unaware.

 

I realize my flaws, and God and I are working on them. The man who sees that and accepts that will know that I am not perfect, but I'm perfect FOR HIM.

 

One ♥